Because He Is A Venti Caramel Macchiato With Whole Milk

Because He Was Taxidermied That Way

Because He Is A Fully Stuffed Baked PUGTATO

Because Horizontal Stripes Are Not Flattering

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Because You Are What You Eat

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Because He Wanted To Be In A Higher Weight Class

Because She Hasn't Lost That Baby Weight

Because Ch-Ch-Ch-Chia